Who makes your life extraordinary?

As I reflect on the past year and a half without my father, I came across my blog post from last Fathers Day.  I thought I’d share.

Love you Dad xo

Repost:

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As the clock hit 12:01 I still hadn’t thought about what I wanted to write about regarding it being Father’s Day today. I see people posting on FB about their fathers and their husbands etc, and it is a beautiful thing. I didn’t know what I would feel, since I have recently lost mine, but it still makes me smile. Watching my friends so happy, sending tributes to the Fathers’s in their lives, is just awesome. Then I started to look back through some of the condolences that had been sent to my family, and they began to tell a tale of a man that may have been smaller than all of his kids, but had a HUGE impact on peoples lives. There were many stories from past coworkers passed along. Here is one that made me laugh and left me with a huge smile because when I close my eyes I can hear it happening.

(Paraphrasing)

A past coworker was in his mid twenties when hired by Canada Trust to work in Sales Finance. Due to a shortage of space. He found himself at a desk on the executive floor which allowed him the chance to rub shoulders with the “big guys”. He found it somewhat intimidating initially, to be sharing floor space with the CT executive but that fear quickly diminished due to the encouragement and support that he was shown, particularly from our father, Jed. He had been working for about a year when Dad pulled him aside one afternoon and offered him a promotion to a more senior position. As he had just become a new father and job security was now part of his thought process, the idea of accepting this was scary. He went on to tell Dad that it might be best suited for someone with more experience. After what seemed like an eternity Dad finally spoke and said ” of course it’s going to be a challenge but what’s the worst thing that can happen”. He replied that the thought of being fired had crossed his mind. Our father looked him straight in the eyes and said “son, you are correct that if you frig up I will fire you but if getting fired is the worse thing that can happen to you in your life, you are living a pretty fortunate life”. Those words were spoken to him 30 years ago and he said that sometimes when things aren’t going the way he was hoping, he thinks back to what Dad told him and realizes how lucky he is.

There are many more stories like this. The more that I read, the more that I wondered, did Dad actually know the impact that he had on these peoples lives?

Had they ever called him and told him what he had meant to them?
I don’t know the answer to those questions, and there is a possibility that most probably had. But, what if he didn’t know the effect he had made on peoples lives. Which reminded me of one of my favourite speeches from any movie.

Here it is:

“The words that are spoken at a funeral are spoken too late for the man who is dead. What a wonderful thing it would be to visit your own funeral. To sit at the front and hear what was said. Maybe to say a few things yourself. Michael and I grew old together. But at times, when we laughed, we grew younger. If he was here now, if he could hear what I say, I’d congratulate him on being a great man, and thank him for being a friend.”
Excerpt from “Waking Ned Devine”

Is there anyone that has made or continues to make your life extraordinary? Do they know it?
Maybe it is time for you to tell them.

Dad
It is a privilege to be called your son, thank you for all that you have given me. Your laugh, your mind, your heart and most of all your love. I will miss you forever.
Say Goodnight Dad
I love you
Adam

Ps “there’s a big difference between the man who has ten years of experience and the man who has one year of experience ten times over” Quote #792 from Jed Purcell #JedSaid

So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodnight…xoxo

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Tic toc tic toc…its almost 4 o’clock on Monday June 1st, 2015.  I sit, palms full of sweat as my longtime friend, boss and business partner walks into the room for our usual Monday meeting.  The next few moments were going to be the hardest that I have ever faced.

Mike, we need to talk.  After a few minutes of me explaining where my mind was and the process that I have gone through. I spoke the words that I have been so very scared to say.  “I am putting my notice in, and will be leaving The Red Stag as General Manager”.

The room went silent.  I had said what I needed to say, and now I waited.  This was someone that had come to me and asked me to be a partner in his business 12 years ago.  This is someone that had helped me learn the ropes of the restaurant industry.  This was a friend.  This was the Godfather of my daughter…and how did he react?

With love.

Though very surprised, I can honestly say that the reaction that Mike Condy gave me upon my putting in my notice was a true testament to the man.  The hardest working bar owner in Halifax, also has quite a massive heart, and I cannot thank him enough for all that he has done for me.

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Thank you, to the customers and friends of The Stag.  Thank you so much for being such amazing and loyal friends.  In my tenure as GM, I made sure that you were always number one on our list and that our staff did their best to make you feel that way.  They will continue to do so, as the standards will remain the same.

Thank you, to my back of house, keep putting out the delicious eats and never ever lose your sense of humour.  That is what keeps you all together.  Chef Frankie Fingers.  We have been through a lot together, many wars, many good times, and lots of GREAT talks.  There were times that you helped me through tough circumstances, and I am pretty sure I have helped you through some as well.  That office was our sanctuary and you never knew what enlightening conversation would take place.  I am going to miss those times, but I know that in the end I have found a lifelong friend and for that I am very happy!

Thank you, to my front of house staff, the original “Caring Counts Crew”.  What a ride!  It started with a bunch of fun personalities and a General Manager that was given that title far before he was ready.  Over the years we grew up together, we learned together, we laughed together, and most importantly we held it together.  I take great pride in saying that as of June 22, 2015 The Red Stag will have been opened for 9 years.  A venue that in recent memory had not had a lot of long term success, and we have been able to maintain.  What has made that happen, is not only the great food, but more importantly how you, the service staff, have made everyone who walks in the front door feel.  We are known as a service mecca, and it is not me, but you who have made that happen.

https://books.google.ca/books?id=Z_8YBAAAQBAJ&pg=PT52&lpg=PT52&dq=caring+counts+pub&source=bl&ots=VJIolBtzo9&sig=EU5KIbg7D4UNh6JrSrEw74zYayE&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0CCsQ6AEwBGoVChMIy7nGy_GQxgIVCPeACh2YDgB0#v=onepage&q=caring%20counts%20pub&f=false

I know that Bryana “Gangsta” will keep this going, and show the next GM the way we have always done things. Thank you Bry for helping this to be a smooth transition. You rock!

So, as sad as it makes me to say, as of July 2nd 2015 I will be handing in my keys to The Red Stag Tavern.  I will be remaining a shareholder of The Stag, Lower Deck, and Lower Deck Clayton Park so I still have their best interests at heart.  However, I must take my next step.

The next step, in short…

I will be focusing on time with my young family.  My “work” will consist of pursing my dream of taking #CaringCounts as far as I can and I hope to inspire people along the way.  As a family, we also relaunched my Organo Gold coffee business as our family business.  So now my business partners are my wife Sarah, my 3.5 yr old daughter Bria, and 19 month son Sam.  Pretty cool feeling.  It is going to be a fun and crazy ride, but I am looking forward to it.

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In closing, I am going to borrow a quote that was said to me very recently by my GREAT friend Chef Frankie Fingers:

‘The show will go on, because we were never building a factory at The Stag, we were building a home”

Goodbye for now my friends, I love you all.

Adam Purcell

Caring Counts – Founder                                                                                                                                            Organo Gold – Distributor                                                                                                                                       Zombie Loyalist – Creator

Contact: Adam@PurcelliRaptor.com

Good Lordy…I’m 40!

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There are birthdays in your life that are true milestones.  0,1, 16, 19 (21 if you’re in The U.S.A.) 25 and the next big one is 40.  To those that aren’t here yet, it is a scary thought, yes?  40 seemed so old when you were 16.  I thought that by the time that I was 40 I would know everything.

Here is the truth, after a bottle of Red Wine I walk like I did when I was 1, I have the same sense of humour as a 16 yr old, I act like I’m 19, and I still feel like I’m 25.

I do know more, yes; I care more about others, yes; However, I don’t know everything.

BUT, here are three pieces of wisdom that I as a new member of the 40 club, want to pass along to the young people that may listen because they think I know “stuff” (hehe):

1) “You need to bet on your strengths, and don’t give a f*** at what you suck at”

GaryVee

@GaryVee https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSjNhtk-Yik

I know that I am not “neat”.  I know that I am not a “numbers” guy.  I know that I am not a “suit” guy.  I know that I am “NOT a “fix it” guy.  I know that I am not a “make a plan” guy.

My office is a disaster, and for some reason for me to pick my socks up off of the floor at home is like lifting an anvil.

anvil

I am truly sorry for those that have to pick up the pieces behind me, it is honestly not on purpose. (Special mention to my beautiful wife Sarah, and long list of Assistant Mgrs, sorry)

What I am good at:  Relationships.  Service.  Caring about other people. Helping others.  Understanding what will make other people happy.  Putting myself in other peoples shoes.  Being genuine, and I am not afraid to just be ME.

I just turned 40, and I may not have everything that I want…yet.  However, I am more comfortable in my own skin than I have ever been.  I know what I am good at, and I am going to concentrate on that and win!

2) “Don’t miss anything.  Don’t miss the game.  Don’t miss the performance. Don’t miss the show, or the movie…” Jim Rohn.

Jim-Rohn

The above quote is a BIG goal of mine moving forward.  I love what I do, but I have missed a lot.  My life used to be…well…my life.  Now it belongs to my lovely wife Sarah and my beautiful kids.  If I am not living for them then who am I living it for?  If I miss the important parts of their lives, why?  Do I want to hear my daughter tell me the story of how she hit the big home run, or for her to remember the look on my face when she touched home plate?

I believe she will remember that look FOREVER!

3) #CaringCounts

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“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Maya Angelou

I get asked all of the time what the term #CaringCounts means.  Some know where it came from but, just in case you don’t here is a little overview from a recent article.

http://halifaxcitizen.ca/2015/02/17/caringcounts-caring-for-customers/

However, what I am finding is it is less about what this term means to me, and more what it means to others.  Some use it as a “Pay it forward” some as a “Random act of kindness” and some just to ask for help.  In the end for me, it is just about helping people with a smile, my time or monetarily if I have the ability to do so.  I can’t possibly help everyone, but if I am able to, I do it!

In the end, the best part of my birthday, is that my wife threw me a surprise party.  I said that I didn’t want a surprise party or a party at all.  However, as usual, she knew best.  It was probably the best present that I could have asked for.  Watching a group of people all in a room for me, was pretty cool, once I got over the awkwardness ;)  Then when I started to mingle from person to person, I began to see all of the pockets of awesome people that I know from different parts of my life.  It was truly amazing!

Thanks to Sarah (xo) and all that were able to come, and to those that sent their love.  I am sending it right back!

So to me, 40 is not the end…it is just the beginning.

“I am going to make the rest of my life, the best of my life”

sarah

Cheers!

AP

#CaringCounts

Note: The last surprise was that my wife and a couple of close friends made shirts with my #CaringCounts logo to sell and raise money for charity.  This was the first time that it has been on a shirt, which was very cool.  As well, seeing other people wearing it was quite surreal, and it gets me all warm and mushy😉

Book Review: “Happywork” by Chris Reimer

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Are you happy at work, not just content, but truly happy?

Below is an excerpt from “Happywork”:                                                                                                                                                                                                                        “Well, what’s your purpose at work?  Do we need one?  I think we do. Did you know you’ll spend, on average, 100,000 hours of your life at work?”

The line above shocks you at first but then you realize it is absolutely true.  We always rely on our families, friends, vacations and our hobbies to bring us the joy in our lives.  However, when you take away sleeping, you are at work for at least half of your waking life.  So to truly live a happy one, the first step is to find out what you love to do, and do it.  That is not it though….

What “Happywork” addresses, is if you are unhappy at work, it isn’t necessarily your job that makes you unhappy, but it could be the environment in which you work.   You can find your true calling, and have the most positive outlook, intentions and goals.  Though, what happens when the culture that you are working in does not fuel you but actively works to suppress you? Your co workers don’t want to lift you up but would rather trip you and laugh when you fall?

Chris Reimer takes us on a journey, that in a business when sales are down and productivity slows, it isn’t about the numbers on the spreadsheet it’s usually about the names on the timesheet.(<–TweetThis)  It isn’t that they are the wrong people, but maybe they just aren’t happy and motivated.  Why? Sometimes we all need to take a step back and look at the big picture.  In “Happywork” Chris does a fantastic job of peeling the layers back to see what is at the root of the issue.

I was very glad that I was able to receive an advanced copy of this book, and even more happy to connect with a like minded person like Chris.  If you work in a company, large or small, I highly recommend picking this up.  Even if things seem perfect at your work, “Happywork” could bring some things to light that you can take back to your office that may even improve on that culture.  Hey, maybe they’ll even give you a cookie. 🙂

“Happywork” will be released on February 17th, 2015, but you can pre order the book here:

http://www.chrisreimer.com/happywork/

Follow Chris on Twitter: https://twitter.com/ChrisReimer

#CaringCounts

Adam Purcell

Twitter: https://twitter.com/PurcelliRaptor

Adam is The GM/Shareholder of @TheRedStagHFX in Halifax, Nova Scotia and an OG Consultant

“…people will forget what you  said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel” Maya Angelou